Time to Look Back
Tina Fajardo (aka Clue)
Everyone has his own definition about what life is, and depending on experiences, it could be seen both in its negativity and positivity. It could be either failure or success. Which ever perspective one looks at it, there is always this "acceptance and move on" thing or "keep it up and strive for more" thought that keeps everyone going. And I am no exception. When a year passes and a new comes in, I would say "It's another life to live in!". It's "another life" as I would never know if life will change at an instance in a given year, a change that will make me totally new or change that will push me to start life back at one, or a change that will just add spices to the entire life that has begun since birth. Whatever it is that comes along the way each year, along with the choices I have to make, defines what kind of life I have to live in.
So, what kind of life I had lived in? It's not my usual thing to look back and think of what had happened each year that passed. I consider each year back as "done" and a recall on it won't change anything so it would be useless to ponder things that happened in the past. When an old friend asked how was my 2012 (note: that was the first time someone asked me about things in a past year), I had to flash back how I lived in 2012 and as I recollect each detail, I realized I had been wrong in saying it's useless to look back. I never thought a review of the past would give me a picture of how good my life has become, how nicer it had turned to be, and it feels so good to realize I had the kind of life I always wanted way back! And that's all thanks to the people I met: Gord, The Backpackers, and the nicest people I met in the workplace and everywhere.
My 2012 began with an awesome New Year's Celebration at Mall of Asia with my sister Eiffer. It was our first time to welcome a year outside.
As I had a new experience on the first day of the year, the rest had been so great as well. Here are some of the major trips that made my year the best of all the years:
Along with all those trips and experiences were people who share same passion and interest and those who also wanted to laugh and party all night long with me:
I know life is not just about partying! It's not just about fun and adventures. It's too way far from mountain climbing, from surfing, from being a rover. Life sucks at times. Sometimes we screw up, get hurt, and turn upside down. Sometimes we find ourselves lost and don't know which way back home or which path to walk on or which options to choose. Like anyone, I had a fair share of the worst things that can happen, the heart aches and yearning and all kinds of stuff. But life is all about decisions on how you want it to be. In my case, I had chosen to live the life of a dreamer, a kind of life which I'd dreamed of and I chased 'em...
... a kind of life apart from prohibitions as I wanted to uncover the logic behind every restriction and see for myself why I wasn't supposed to do it
... a kind of life that was free from fear as I wanted to discover my limitations, my strengths and weaknesses so I would know up to where I could lead my life to
... a kind of life full of affection and love from the people I care the most
... a life of a dreamer, that's what I got for 2012. Everything that had happened was what I had dreamed long before 2012 - the mountains I climbed, the people I climbed with, the adventures I had dreamed of, the kind of love and relationship I thought only in dreams could exist, the places I visited, the new things I had tried and done - they were all a "dream com true" chapter of my life, something that is worth reminiscing as it shows how I got free from my confinement and discovered how farther I had walked through the paths of what I call "my life".
Now, 2013 is here and wherever my feet take me into, I am sure that would make a difference. Will it be good or bad, disastrous or beneficial - these will be answered after the year ends. In the meantime, I will continue to live as a dreamer and see what dreams may come.
